Eric James Borges
Nineteen year old Eric endured a lifetime of abuse and bullying, both at school and at home. Coming from a devout Christian family who refused to accept homosexuality as anything other than a sin, Eric's parents did all they could to rid him of the "gay curse" that possessed him. They told him he was disgusting, perverted, unnatural; and was going to hell. They even performed a ritual exorcism on him in the hope of “curing” him of his orientation. When that failed, they disowned him and kicked him out of their house.
Not only was Eric's home life a living hell but so was his school life. He recalled being physically abused as far back as Kindergarten for being different from the other boys. The fact that teachers appeared indifferent to his horrors simply added to his feelings of isolation, helplessness and self loathing.
Not only was Eric's home life a living hell but so was his school life. He recalled being physically abused as far back as Kindergarten for being different from the other boys. The fact that teachers appeared indifferent to his horrors simply added to his feelings of isolation, helplessness and self loathing.
"At school my name was not Eric but "Faggot". I reached my limit when I was assaulted in a full classroom with a teacher present. I dropped out, went on independent studies, graduated early and started college. " - Eric James Borges
Eric was teased his entire life for being different. He was physically, mentally, emotionally and verbally assaulted on a day-to-day basis and had absolutely nowhere to go to escape it and no one to turn to for support. After being disowned by his parents, Eric decided to make a fresh start in San Joaquin Valley. He started working as an intern with The Trevor Project and met a kindly woman named Jennifer McGuire, who took him him and became the Mother figure he'd never had.
It looked like Eric's life was finally beginning to get better. He decided to make a video for the "It Gets Better" campaign, in which he speaks candidly about the bullying and homophobia he faced growing up. In comparison to the life he once had, Eric's life did indeed "Get Better", but unfortunately, sometimes in life, psychological scars cut much deeper than anyone can imagine and the horrors of our past often dictate the actions for our future. Eric's entire life had been a struggle and ultimately it took it's toll on his very being. Just a few months after making his "It Gets Better" video, Eric committed suicide.
It looked like Eric's life was finally beginning to get better. He decided to make a video for the "It Gets Better" campaign, in which he speaks candidly about the bullying and homophobia he faced growing up. In comparison to the life he once had, Eric's life did indeed "Get Better", but unfortunately, sometimes in life, psychological scars cut much deeper than anyone can imagine and the horrors of our past often dictate the actions for our future. Eric's entire life had been a struggle and ultimately it took it's toll on his very being. Just a few months after making his "It Gets Better" video, Eric committed suicide.
"My pain is not caused because I am gay. My pain was caused by how I was treated because I am gay." - Eric James Borges
The decision to end his life was something Eric thought about in great detail. It certainly wan't a rash decision during a time when he was feeling low. On the contrary, he planned his own funeral service, stated that he wanted his money shared between various benefactors, including Lady Gaga's Born This Way Foundation, The Trevor Project, The Human Rights Campaign and the lady who was like a Mother to him, Jennifer McGuire for her upcoming same sex wedding.
Mourners flocked to his funeral service, where Eric was remembered and honored by friends, work colleagues and strangers alike. His parents were invited but didn't attend.
While officiate and friend, William Van VanLandingham, the director of the local chapter of Trevor Project, noted that “we are not here to point fingers,” Jennifer McGuire, the kind stranger who had opened her home to Eric and had grown to love him, spoke to the mourners candidly:
Mourners flocked to his funeral service, where Eric was remembered and honored by friends, work colleagues and strangers alike. His parents were invited but didn't attend.
While officiate and friend, William Van VanLandingham, the director of the local chapter of Trevor Project, noted that “we are not here to point fingers,” Jennifer McGuire, the kind stranger who had opened her home to Eric and had grown to love him, spoke to the mourners candidly:
“He tells his story better than any of us could in his short film and ‘It Gets Better’ video, but I need it to be spoken out loud – and said for him … his parents tortured him – there is no other word to describe it. What he shared in his video was the tip of the iceberg, and that’s only compared with what he shared with me, and I am sure there was more. His parents tortured him by not protecting him from the extensive bullying. His parents tortured him through their relentless, extremist religious teachings. His parents tortured him with shame and intolerance and emotional and physical abuse that most of us can’t even begin to imagine. And yes, I blame them, and not just a little, but for a majority percentage … His parents killed him.” - Jennifer McGuire
Poignant words indeed from a lady who came to regard Eric as the son. Just as poignant however is a quote from Eric's "It Gets Better" video ....
"You will date, fall in love, fall out of love, have your heart broken, just like the rest of us. You will love, and be loved, and I love you. you have an entire life fit to burst with opportunities ahead of you. Don’t ever give up, and don’t ever for one second think that you aren’t a valuable and beautiful contribution to this world." - Eric James Borges